So these are completely random stories I wrote out of sheer boredom...they are unlikely to make any sense and are very ambiguous...
Life as we know it
“You’re kidding right?” Those were the first words to run through my mind and shakily tumble off my lips as I slowly took in all that was going on….this has definitely got to be some kind of stupid, dumb joke” I thought….I looked at Sheila’s face and she somehow seemed to confirm what I was dreading… “This couldn’t possibly be true…”…Suddenly full of energy I angrily moved closer to the car, got in, sat down and looked, stared at the driver. I really couldn’t read his face and the commotion outside didn’t seem to be helping. Anger, frustration, sadness seemed to slowly climb inside of me. As I listened, it was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard, I had a zillion questions….I muttered out about four….I didn’t know if I should cry or scream….my better side thought maybe I ought to feel sorry for this “driver”, maybe it wasn’t his fault and he was just as bewildered as I was….maybe it was my fault, I could have done better, I could have been more responsible.
I needed assurance from someone, anyone…that it wasn’t my fault.
I sank in my seat and I stared out the window……life had to go on.
*names changed
I sit at my desk...
I sit at my desk, I shift in my seat, I sit up again, and then I sink.
This was pointless. I yawn. I stare out the window. I exhale.
I’d gone through a somewhat similar routine several times before for one year and five months …almost a year and a half. It was even worse now because my boss and just recently had a “talk” with me….one that I would compare to that of a boarding school matron addressing a dormitory of high school students….a lecture of sorts. “Sometimes you disappear from your desk” was one of the many ‘accusations’ I felt he was throwing at me….what he actually meant was I leave my desk…sometimes, when I’m through with my pending tasks ofcorse, and I want to catch a break, some fresh air…get away for a few minutes from that dull desk, with no access to anything, other than excel sheets and the company’s systems for work. No internet. And shut in a room surrounded by one two many older, duller (much much more) frustrated human beings.
I stare out the window again and glance at the tiny digital clock at the corner of my computer screen….half an hour till lunch.
If only I could get out of here, take my lovely grey high heels outside, share a little bit of what I know…negotiate and then convince. Make a presentation, look my 'superior' in the eye as if I know it all, chuckling inside because I know I really don’t. Feel some nerves, feel some excitement, maybe even a sense of accomplishment. Get congratulated. A firm handshake…..anything!
A quarter an hour till lunch.